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When a Cat is Not For You

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People have made cats the most popular pet in the United States, United Kingdom, and many other countries. Yet, the cat is still maligned and misunderstood.

Cat, the OriginalWhile cats are low maintenance in many ways, their emotional needs are even more challenging than dogs are. People don’t realize that, then don’t meet the cat’s needs, then complain that cats are not affectionate or interesting.

Much of the cat’s appeal lies in their reputation for easy care and lack of walks. Busy apartment dwellers can especially appreciate these qualities. Yet, if we regard the cat as a second tier pet, something we get because we can’t get a dog, the relationship will not work if you don’t regard a cat as capable of affection and interactivity.

If you think otherwise, I have to break it to you… it’s you who is being unaffectionate and uninteresting.

A common saying is, “You know the problem with kittens, don’t you? They grow up to be cats!” That’s because when kittens start to be adults, they start expecting adult relationships from their humans. You know adult relationships, don’t you? Those are the ones that are the result of respect and mutual regard between two equals.

That’s what a cat wants.

The cat doesn’t want to bear the full burden of the relationship. The cat doesn’t want to be the one who is always asking for affection or to be fitted into your schedule. The cat wants to be regarded as interesting, adorable, worthy. The cat wants to know they are loved.

So if you think cats don’t need affection or attention, you are mistaken about the low-maintenance aspect of a cat’s emotional life. It would be better for all concerned if you went for the goldfish instead.

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