I’ve read two books recently that came together to form this post. But neither of them had anything to do with cats.

One is Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough, a fairly recent book which caused some controversy when it came out; a probably deliberate one, since it uses the word “settle” in the context of romantic love.

The book does point out that being excessively fixated on our “ideal mate” can cause us to overlook people with true soulmate potential. It might turn out that our mental picture of our ideal mate was unrealistic and unlikely. And this, the author adds, will help us escape what would otherwise be our sad fate; becoming an old maid with several cats.

The other book shall remain nameless because I am kind. This was an adventure book, which certainly delivers in the explosions! and shootings! and mysterious death traps in the heart of mountains! category. And plenty of exclamation points.

I was already going to bail out because of the poor style. But then they put a cherry on top of my disappointment, because the gutsy heroine, the reason I was attracted in the first place, mused on a setback by looking ahead to a sad possible future, wherein she would be a failure; an old maid with several cats.

I’m starting to see a pattern here.

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It’s a cliche, isn’t it? The old maid with several cats. And if there’s anything we fear and avoid, it’s being a cliche.

Yet, cliches only came about because they contain a germ of truth. “White as snow” is a cliche, yet since 1611, when it appeared in the King James Bible, it remains a true statement. And I’m sure it was used, and still true, even before that.

Just what is wrong with having more than one cat? People worry about how they are regarded by society if they have cats. People can fret about acquiring the label of “crazy cat lady.” But I admit it; I’m crazy about cats.

Because there isn’t any reason not to be.

I can’t worry about becoming a cliche; because every time it comes up, I’m irresistibly reminded of the marvelous closing lines of the movie classic, Marty, which won Oscars for Best Picture, Director, Actor, and Screenplay in 1955.

Ernest Borgnine plays the title character, who has gone to a dance and met a girl he likes. But he hesitates about calling her again; his friends are giving him a hard time because they think she is plain-looking. So as he contemplates another evening with his single friends, or going home to his mother, he suddenly bursts out:

You don’t like her. My mother don’t like her. She’s a dog. And I’m a fat, ugly man. Well, all I know is I had a good time last night. I’m gonna have a good time tonight. If we have enough good times together, I’m gonna get down on my knees. I’m gonna beg that girl to marry me.

I love this scene because Marty breaks through prejudice here; the prejudice of society’s opinions about what attractiveness is. He himself has suffered from it, his possible girlfriend has suffered from it. And he realizes; there isn’t any reason for either of them to suffer anymore.

In this instance, as in so many others, society is wrong. Marty reaches for potential happiness by deciding to make up his own mind about what makes him happy. And so can we.

Since society is wrong about cats, isn’t it also wrong about the people who love them?

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