Last weekend, I made meatloaf. Which meant eight month old Tristan got locked in the bathroom.

Most of the time he perches on the cat cabinet, or the kitchen stool placed near the work area, and simply watches like a Good Boy. He gets a few reminders and he’ll ignore brownie batter. But the combination of raw hamburger and my mixing it with my hands means if his curiosity gets the better of his common sense, there’s not a lot I can do about it.

Thus, I do a pre-emptive strike; and put him somewhere else.

This simple precaution is an excellent kitten approach; past a certain point, they aren’t learning anything, and we are getting exasperated, so it’s time for the lesson to be over. Then we can complete our task, and they can ponder their lesson, or not, depending on their age.

Our kitten needs raising in a way that acknowledges their needs and limitations. So if we find ourselves getting frustrated, both we and the cat need a “time out.” In this case, I started by assembling my ingredients. When Tristan persisted in getting on my kitchen cart, I was able to put him away before my hands were too messy to do so.

The other part happened when he was let out of the bathroom. He looked up from the bathmat where he had been curled up, and didn’t rush to get out the door.

But about ten minutes later, he raced over to leap in my lap, and dug his shoulder into my chest; this is his Demand Hugging. I have to stop and press him against me with both hands, while he purrs.

He’s done this since he was tiny. He did it this time because he was worried I didn’t love him any more. I deliberately didn’t get into anything too demanding of my attention in case he did want reassurance. In minutes, he was fine again, and off he went on a kitten mission.

This is how the cuddly kitten stays cuddly.

This might be the most sensitive part of our cat’s development; when our kitten’s growing maturity pushes them towards independence, and their sweet heart demands support and closeness.

It might not have looked like it from a distance, but Tristan got his feelings hurt by being locked away; he knew he had been reprimanded; and he didn’t know what I thought of him afterward.

If I hadn’t made a point of keeping a watch for his overture, and immediately and happily reassuring him, his feelings would have stayed hurt. If he was a less assertive cat, his reaching out could have been much more low-key. It could have been overlooked.

It can be as simple as a glance.
It can be as simple as returning that glance.

Cats live in a way that keeps them attuned to every little thing we do. If we return the favor at important times, we keep that connection between us strong and deep.

Tristan strongly seeks out connections; this makes him both demanding, and easy.

Yes, he is amazing. But, he’s not unusual.

When Tristan jumped into my lap, I was able to turn on the Mac’s iSight camera and do a little filming. That’s why the lighting and color values are not the best.

We rescued a tiny kitten, not knowing anything about him. See all my posts about Tristan.

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There’s more ways to get our cat to be affectionate in The Way of Cats than the article you are reading now. See all of my CAT AFFECTION posts.