We might regard that as good or bad, but when it comes to cat/human friendship, misunderstandings aren’t funny; they’re sad.
Here’s some of the most common ways good intentions go awry.
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The Deadly Belly. As I explain in Cat Affection Move: The Belly, people mistake the cat’s belly move for a dog’s. Dogs like having their bellies vigorously rubbed on the slightest pretext. Cats don’t.
We are far better off admiring the belly. We can pretend we are going to pet the belly… and then we don’t. We can point to the belly, and wiggle our fingers as though we are petting the belly; but we are not.
These kinds of mental games are enjoyable, and safe, ways to reciprocate the trust the cat is showing with by exposing their belly; without pushing it too far.
The Smacked Head. A cat extends their head to show interest. We stick our big palm in their face and bounce it on the top of their head.
We think we’re being affectionate. The cat thinks we are threatening a beat down.
Rubbing their chest is a far better way to show respect and gentleness. And… guess what? Dogs like it better, too. Remember to use the Fist of Friendship.
The Air Rescue. Suddenly being yanked upward by our collarbones is a good thing when it’s our fifth day at sea and the emergency rations have run out. But it’s always a terrible way to pick up our cat.
Our cat might be pickup-shy because we’re always doing it the wrong way. We should use both hands; or forearms, if we have a large cat. Slide one hand under their chest, and use the other to scoop up their powerful hindquarters.
Remember, cat spines are incredibly flexible; but this also makes them prone to torsion and uncomfortable positions if they are picked up as though they were teddy bears or human infants. They are neither of those things.
We can get our cat used to being picked up by using a cat affection move I call The Forklift. This is another way to let our cat know we want to hug them; not hang them.
The biggest way we send the wrong signals to cats is to mistake the cat for someone else; for a dog, a baby, or a stuffed animal.
If we treat them as though they were a cat, it’s amazing how much more happily they respond.
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There’s more ways to get our cat to be affectionate in The Way of Cats than the article you are reading now. See all of my CAT AFFECTION posts.
