So we have decided to get our first cat. Great!

We want to get a kitten. Stop right there!

Of course we want a kitten. There’s the baby cuteness, the adorable actions of a tiger in miniature, the instant cuddling, the play machine personality. I adore kittens!

But they are not a good choice for the Cat Newbie.

The best cat for a Cat Newbie is an adult cat.

How can this be? We want to embark on a Cat Adventure, and of course we want to start at the very beginning. We want a kitten so we can start from scratch, so to speak. We worry about Used Cats. And just look at that little face!

Sit down, breathe into a paper bag, and reconsider.

I’m only thinking of success. Because if this is our First Cat, we don’t know how things can go terribly wrong, do we?

What could possibly go terribly wrong with a sweet little kitten?

They are numskulls. Of course, this is part of their appeal. But I must stress kittens know nothing. How can they? They just arrived.

So the kitten is going to scratch everything in sight, run full tilt into breakable objects, bite and scratch our hands when we are trying to cuddle them, and find every toy we gave them with bells or rattles and play with them in the middle of the night. We will get up and put them away.

Then they will find more. They always find more.

Do we know how to deal with all of that in a way that will not ruin our future cat relationship? Probably not. We are Cat Newbies.

Will we attempt to train the kitten as we would a puppy? Probably, since most people have some experience with that, or know people who do. When we try to apply dog techniques to a kitten, the result is disastrous. We will teach the kitten to fear us, and under stress, they will misbehave more.

And that cute little face, the very thing that got us into this, will soon be gone.

Forever.

Leaving us with a Cat.

They grow up. This is our goal, of course. We want them to grow into a loving and playful companion, since they are going to spend three-fourths of their lives as not-a-kitten.

So if we don’t find adult cats appealing, what do we plan to do with our kitten in a few months? They are not a toy; they are a baby. They are going to grow up blazingly fast. By six months, they will be embarking on Cat Adolescence.

And I bet we didn’t think of that.

Teenaged cats. Just as with humans, cat teenagers can be a trial.

If we are new to cats, we don’t know how to discipline kittens with love and respect. We might not discipline them at all! They are so cute when they are tiny, trying to knock over our media tower.

Then they get bigger, and they do.

This is the Catch 22 of kittens. This is the pitfall I am trying to keep Cat Newbies from falling into. This is what ruins cat relationships, and turns a Cat Newbie into a person who says, “Cats? I had one once. But they aren’t trainable, or even affectionate. I’ll never have a cat again!”

Because just as our kitten is getting big enough to do some real damage, (and without proper training, of course they will,) the kitten starts to look more like a Cat. And at the same time, they become Aloof.

This is an important stage all growing kittens go through. The kitten is becoming a Cat. So they will test their power, and our patience. They will see if we truly love them. They will wonder why we don’t know how to tell them what they need to do to make us stop yelling at them and squirting them with water and ignoring them.

We don’t know how to do it. We are a Cat Newbie.

And the Cat Newbie thinks all the myths about cat affection are true. They stop trying to connect with the cat, because they think they can’t connect with the cat.

Just like that, in the space of a few months, It’s Over.

Because the Cat Newbie doesn’t have the skills to handle cat adolescence.

And now we have what we refused to consider before. We have a Cat. A cat we don’t feel affectionate towards, a cat who ruins our stuff, a cat who seems to hate us.

I tried, but somebody didn’t listen.

This situation can still be fixed. But isn’t it better to avoid it? Why do I advise Cat Newbies to get an adult? Aren’t they going to wind up with a Cat anyway? And an adult shelter cat, besides! Won’t there be something wrong with them? Aren’t they cats ruined by Cat Newbies?

I’m saying this because cat adolescence only lasts for a while. By the time we have a more mature cat, we no longer will be dealing with the reflexive independence the cat teenager tries out with varying degrees of success. With help, or without, an adult cat is wiser, more patient, more clever, and more able to communicate with humans.

And that’s what the Cat Newbie needs. The Cat Newbie can’t teach, because they’ve never been taught. They need to take a Cat Course.

And there’s nobody better at teaching a Cat Course than the Adult Cat.

What Cat Newbies mesmerized by kitten cuteness do not realize is that two Newbies embarking on a Cat Adventure will multiply potential problems. Do we set out for the Amazon with someone else who knows nothing about it either? Doesn’t sound like a good idea.

Someone has to know what they are doing.

So my best advice is to get an Adult Cat. We will know what we are getting; playful, friendly, cuddly; and we know it will not change. We can start with the basic litter and food routines without training. The Adult Cat is not going to getting into everything, biting and scratching because they don’t know manners yet or the power of their own weapons. When they explore in the middle of the night, they do it more quietly.

We will be amazed that we can teach the cat where to scratch and what to leave alone in just a few tries. The skills we need for Adult Cat are not only easier to pick up, they work fast. Because the Adult Cat understands how to please. Because the Adult Cat has an attention span.

Something notably lacking in younger cats.

And then… this is the best part… in just a few months– the time it would take for our kitten to start triggering feelings of despair if we didn’t listen– we can get that kitten.

And both of us will raise the kitten; easier, faster, and with more enjoyment.

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Doesn’t that sound… great?

Got here from a Link or Search?
There’s more to choosing a cat with The Way of Cats than the article you are reading now. See my CHOOSING A CAT.