The Way of Cats

Do cats have a sense of humor? Of course they do!

Cats enjoy a good joke. Because of our differing verbal abilities, it’s not like we can sit around and tell them to each other. But when expressed through body language, we can have a good time with our cat.

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One joke my cats enjoy is the game of Which Hand? I put in a treat in my hand, and shuffle it behind my back. If they paw at the hand which opens to reveal a treat, they get it. When the hand they paw at opens without a treat, we get a look which will make us laugh.

Put a treat or toy under some little boxes. Show the cat we have hidden something under one of them, then shuffle. Encourage the cat to investigate the boxes.

The laser light toy is one cats don’t get tired of because there are so many baffling aspects to it. Dear Husband recently let the light quiver inside one of my slippers, exciting RJ. We could tell he thought he had cornered that red dot at last. When his pouncing on the slipper resulted in the red dot appearing somewhere else, he took it in good humor. He realizes the red dot has magical qualities.

These tricks we play on the cats are ones they don’t mind because they enjoy puzzles and thinking. Their considerable mental abilities, (as great as a six year old child’s according to many studies,) makes them appreciate mental games far more than most people realize. They know we are pulling their leg by hiding their treats and toys. They like it.

Can cats play jokes back at us? I think so.

Mr. Bond likes to leave his play mice in our bed. Not just left on the bedspread, but hidden under the pillows and stuffed down under the covers. We always laugh when we find them at bedtime, when Mr. Bond is sure to be there and enjoy our discovery. How can we call this a joke? Isn’t Mr. Bond just leaving “food” for us to show he cares?

One night Dear Husband played the joke back at him by pretending to eat the mouse. Mr. Bond gave me a sideways look which clearly expressed his belief that Dear Husband was not getting it, and, in fact, should be checked for a mental condition. So Mr. Bond knows these mice aren’t real. He knows they aren’t meant to be eaten. We hide toys on him, so why shouldn’t he do the same to us?

RJ makes a game out of racing us to the chair in the computer room. He always beats the person in there, and then sprawls on the chair, beaming up at us. He gets rewarded with laughs and cuddles. But we didn’t come up with this game. He did.

Cats love our attention. That’s why, if they do something and it makes us laugh, they will do it again. We could understand a cat doing something and getting praise or petting. But when a cat does something just to make us laugh, it shows that they know laughter is a good thing. They like to do it, for us.

We should return the favor.

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We should think of space the way cats do to help us understand compatibility problems.

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We can have two cats who don’t get along and the house is not big enough for both of them. We can have ten cats in the same house, as I once did, and they all get along. Doesn’t this defy the laws of physics?

However, cats do not obey the laws of physics. How much space each cat takes up is calculated not on the mass of the cat, but on their presence.

The presence of the cat is how much influence the cat can exert on the cat environment just by being there. This is how a five pound cat with a lot of presence gets their favorite spots and can be first at the food bowl without us seeing how they do it. But the other cats sense their abilities and defer to it.

For instance, RJ never gets on Mr. Bond’s nerves. Mr. Bond will not let him. That’s how sometimes RJ can leap across the room and wrestle with him, and sometimes RJ changes course mid-leap and find something else to play with. James Bond has a lot of presence, and this makes his wishes something to defer to.

Poor Puffy, on the other hand, has zero presence. That’s why, when RJ was a kitten, he would harass Puffy, unless we stepped in and stop it. Without our enforcement of Puffy’s space, it would shrink to his favorite hiding spot under the bed, and occasional forays out for essential bodily functions. We protect all of Puffy’s usual spaces, and his routes to and from them, so he can remain happy despite having no presence to enforce his wishes on other cats.

When it comes to his humans, Puffy has considerable powers. One begging look and we melt and do his bidding. But Puffy cannot exude presence to other cats. And RJ knows it.

Cats don’t get along when they don’t have enough presence, or support in the lack, to create harmonious relationships among unavoidable shared areas. We used to lock RJ in the bathroom at mealtimes because Puffy can’t, and Mr. Bond won’t, use their presence to keep him in check at such times. Mr. Bond could keep RJ away from his food, but he doesn’t seem to have the heart to divert RJ from his serious food issues. So we step in.

Stepping in to enforce cat harmony is something within our power, but it must be used wisely. We could try to keep RJ away from the other cat’s bowls by standing in the kitchen and continually diverting him back to his bowl. There’s food in it; why can’t he just eat his food and not bother the other cats?

With a normal kitten, this would be good practice and would teach the kitten the importance of sharing. But RJ is not a normal kitten. He was starved in his previous life. He can’t think when there’s other food around. Letting him eat in the bathroom is more than a kindness to the other cats; it’s a kindness to him to let him eat without worrying about others snatching his food. Eating their food first, and saving his own for later, is a survival technique that he won’t be talked out of easily.

How does this help us moderate cat conflicts? We have to distinguish between non-negotiable needs and and simple preferences when we try to impose our will on our cats. A cat rescued off the street might have a lowered tolerance for other cats, a cat rescued from a shelter might have a lowered tolerance for noise and disorder, a cat used to outsmarting their littermates will continue this working strategy with other cats in their new home. We don’t always know what the cat’s history might have been, but we can pick up clues from their behavior.

When there are two cats, conflicts are magnified because there’s only one other cat to be whatever the other cat is seeking. Friendship, a play partner, shared observations, or being left alone; each cat might need something different. If there’s only other other cat, and that cat can’t provide what the other cat is seeking, there will be conflict.

With more than one cat to choose from, the chances of the seeking cat finding what they need is increased. With the seeking cat able to find what they need, the pressure comes off the cat who cannot provide it.

This is how I had ten cats living in harmony. This is how I was able to bring the right kitten home and get him fitting in with only a short introduction period. This is why I say, “The solution to cat problems is… more cats!”

It doesn’t make immediate sense to think of cat conflicts as a result of too few cats. Yet, often, that is the case.

Cats, after all, have their own laws.

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Cats have amazing energy storage capacities. They are capable of lying in wait for hours, and then exploding into multiple avenues of action. If the prey goes south, east, or counterclockwise, the cat has a move ready for that eventuality.

Kittens have a rather long learning curve in mastering this tremendous potential. That’s why kittens tend to have only two modes; on, and off.

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When they play, they play hard. When they stop, they stop on a dime. When they sleep, they can be transferred from lap to lap to bed without waking up. So kittens need space and tolerance when they get the “kitten crazies.” Unable to moderate their energy, they tend to expend it all at once, in mad dashes across the living room, skidding turns on the kitchen linoleum, and mountain-climbing the drapes.

The best way to control this energy is to have plenty of safe toys they can turn to. They love things that bounce erratically, and have a lot of different textures on their surface so they can pick them up and bat them around.

They also need space. Keep their toys in rooms where they can run around and there aren’t too many things for them to get into trouble over. Of course, they will venture outward. But, if possible, having a place for them to find new toys will give them a “go to” when they are seeking novelty.

Because kittens can’t control their energies yet, they will likely drop like rocks when they finally get tired. It’s not in a kitten’s nature to say to themselves, Gosh, I’m tired, let me find a good place to sleep. So we are going to find them conked out in various places where they might be in the way, or in danger of sliding off a perch they were on.

It’s perfectly all right to move them to a better spot. We should slide our hands under them to keep them relaxed, and put them on a couch or bed. Don’t leave them on the floor; they will feel safer up and out of the way.

But try not to disturb them otherwise. It’s okay to bring our faces close so they can smell us in their sleep, or rub their heads. But they need their sleep and should be left to it.

Understanding the kitten energy cycle is the first step towards coping with it. They must have room to expend that energy, and they must have time to recharge.

Given both, with supervision, and they will grow up happy and secure.

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