Fortunately, RJ can handle it. He loves to be cuddled, and while he usually wriggles to be let down after a varying period of time, he has a fast reset, and can be cuddled again quickly.
So we humans are able to indulge our desire to rub that furry face, stroke those soft ears, and gently cup his marbled belly. We can hug him like a doll, put him over our shoulder, and plop him on our laps. He will relax and purr and enfold our hands or faces with his paws.
Are we lucky to have such an affectionate cat? Yes, certainly. But this is no accident. Because I chose him for cuddly, and we have trained him for cuddly. We have maximized his considerable cuddling potential into the state-of-the-art example he is today.
Better yet, he won’t lose it as he grows into adulthood. RJ will be cuddly all his life. Because we will continue to nurture his natural instincts, so he will always be able to enjoy a lot of close, affectionate contact with his people.
Anyone can have a cuddly cat. But not every cat has the same cuddling potential. Puffy finds cuddling to be too overwhelming. He enjoys being petted, and, properly coaxed, he will melt into a lap. But he’s not, and never will be, a cuddler.
So to have a cuddly cat, we must choose a cat who has the proper abilities. We can get this kind of cat at any age, if we know what to look for. Most kittens tend to not mind cuddling, but the kitten cuddler of great potential seeks it out. They are quick to relax into our hands, eager to curl up in our laps, and joyous about face to face contact.
RJ was an easy tell; he reached through his shelter cage to pat my face with his paws, and rubbed his muzzle on the bars, desperate for affection. Other kittens will tear themselves away from play to show interest in people, but only cuddler kittens will worm into our hands and seek out our faces, showing their desire for a lot of contact.
Adult cats are even easier. Unlike kittens, they might not show trust right away; that adult reserve can hold them back. But if we are looking at adult cats in a shelter, the people there know the cuddlers. They will be thrilled to help one of their “love bugs” find a forever home, where they can get all the cuddling they want.
If we are searching for a cuddler, that has to be the most important characteristic. We can’t get sidetracked by a pretty face or signs of a breed we always wanted. Cuddlers come male or female, long and slender or round and stocky. If we want a cuddler, nothing else must matter more, or we will compromise and probably come home with a wonderful cat. But they might not be cuddlers.
Once we have a cuddler, we must train them properly so they can retain these happy characteristics. With kittens, it is a matter of helping them stay that way, while with adults it’s more a case of letting them relax into it.
Otherwise, this is a problem that can be solved with more cats! Depending on the present cat situation, of course. Still, there’s very often a slot open for a cuddler, and this sets a good example for the rest of the crew. Cuddly cats tend to be friendly and easy going with all living creatures, and it’s not like the present cats will find themselves shoved out of a lap to make room for the cuddler.
They might find themselves not taking the humans for granted when they see how well the situation works for the new cuddler, and they will thaw.
Which is not a bad thing, at all.
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There’s more ways to get our cat to be affectionate in The Way of Cats than the article you are reading now. See all of my CAT AFFECTION posts.
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This article doesn’t give any direction at all as how to make a kitten or cat cuddly.
Maybe you need more help, like Dear Pammy, Here is where my cat stopped.