The Way of Cats

We should think of space the way cats do to help us understand compatibility problems.

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We can have two cats who don’t get along and the house is not big enough for both of them. We can have ten cats in the same house, as I once did, and they all get along. Doesn’t this defy the laws of physics?

However, cats do not obey the laws of physics. How much space each cat takes up is calculated not on the mass of the cat, but on their presence.

The presence of the cat is how much influence the cat can exert on the cat environment just by being there. This is how a five pound cat with a lot of presence gets their favorite spots and can be first at the food bowl without us seeing how they do it. But the other cats sense their abilities and defer to it.

For instance, RJ never gets on Mr. Bond’s nerves. Mr. Bond will not let him. That’s how sometimes RJ can leap across the room and wrestle with him, and sometimes RJ changes course mid-leap and find something else to play with. James Bond has a lot of presence, and this makes his wishes something to defer to.

Poor Puffy, on the other hand, has zero presence. That’s why, when RJ was a kitten, he would harass Puffy, unless we stepped in and stop it. Without our enforcement of Puffy’s space, it would shrink to his favorite hiding spot under the bed, and occasional forays out for essential bodily functions. We protect all of Puffy’s usual spaces, and his routes to and from them, so he can remain happy despite having no presence to enforce his wishes on other cats.

When it comes to his humans, Puffy has considerable powers. One begging look and we melt and do his bidding. But Puffy cannot exude presence to other cats. And RJ knows it.

Cats don’t get along when they don’t have enough presence, or support in the lack, to create harmonious relationships among unavoidable shared areas. We used to lock RJ in the bathroom at mealtimes because Puffy can’t, and Mr. Bond won’t, use their presence to keep him in check at such times. Mr. Bond could keep RJ away from his food, but he doesn’t seem to have the heart to divert RJ from his serious food issues. So we step in.

Stepping in to enforce cat harmony is something within our power, but it must be used wisely. We could try to keep RJ away from the other cat’s bowls by standing in the kitchen and continually diverting him back to his bowl. There’s food in it; why can’t he just eat his food and not bother the other cats?

With a normal kitten, this would be good practice and would teach the kitten the importance of sharing. But RJ is not a normal kitten. He was starved in his previous life. He can’t think when there’s other food around. Letting him eat in the bathroom is more than a kindness to the other cats; it’s a kindness to him to let him eat without worrying about others snatching his food. Eating their food first, and saving his own for later, is a survival technique that he won’t be talked out of easily.

How does this help us moderate cat conflicts? We have to distinguish between non-negotiable needs and and simple preferences when we try to impose our will on our cats. A cat rescued off the street might have a lowered tolerance for other cats, a cat rescued from a shelter might have a lowered tolerance for noise and disorder, a cat used to outsmarting their littermates will continue this working strategy with other cats in their new home. We don’t always know what the cat’s history might have been, but we can pick up clues from their behavior.

When there are two cats, conflicts are magnified because there’s only one other cat to be whatever the other cat is seeking. Friendship, a play partner, shared observations, or being left alone; each cat might need something different. If there’s only other other cat, and that cat can’t provide what the other cat is seeking, there will be conflict.

With more than one cat to choose from, the chances of the seeking cat finding what they need is increased. With the seeking cat able to find what they need, the pressure comes off the cat who cannot provide it.

This is how I had ten cats living in harmony. This is how I was able to bring the right kitten home and get him fitting in with only a short introduction period. This is why I say, “The solution to cat problems is… more cats!”

It doesn’t make immediate sense to think of cat conflicts as a result of too few cats. Yet, often, that is the case.

Cats, after all, have their own laws.

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There’s more about multiple cats in The Way of Cats than the article you are reading now. See more posts on the MULTIPLE CAT ADVANTAGE.