But this isn’t always possible. Cat genetics being what they are, we often find clusters of traits together in mixed breeds, to the point where I see, over and over again, “types” of mixed breed cats. One of my favorite such types I call “the softball headed cat.”

Past the kitten stage, they are easy to spot; they have a big round head like a softball.

The Shorthairs, Maine Coon or Siberian, Bobtail or Manx, Chartreux, or Folds are all possible ancestors of a softball headed cat.

When we see that head, we usually know what we’re getting: a stocky, cobby, body, a mellow disposition, an easygoing personality, and an energy level that can explode into action, but is not driven to be that way most of the time. There’s also calm, deep, affection and a dry sense of humor.

Many cat breeds are recessive types; we need two breed ancestors to get a purebred which displays those traits. So these types, and the personality they are known for, can lurk in mixed breeds which might not have the physical characteristics, but can certainly have the mental ones. From this blend can spring the different variations which make each cat unique.

I have a softball headed cat right now; our Reverend Jim.

He’s stoic, slow to get ruffled by events, deeply affectionate, and creates little ways to signal he’s ready for hugging and petting. His biggest signal is simply showing up, but it’s up to us to notice that.

In a movie, softball headed cats are the gruff general with a heart of gold, the quiet mechanic who is the only one to figure out how to fix the engines, or the sensible cook who offers wisdom at the exactly right time.

They are usually Betas, but can spring from Gamma stock which gets diluted, as in Persian mixes. They can even have some Alpha cat traits; Chip was a cream tabby built like The Thing from the Fantastic Four, but had a keen intelligence and experimental interest. He would simply spend days plotting while also lying around… because he was a softball headed cat.

As always, the joy is in the mix.

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There are some cats who take this already important interest and turn it up to eleven.

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One of the characteristics of the Gamma cat is attention to detail. This is a survival instinct in the wild, when picking up on small clues would let a cat outwit their prey, or another predator. Gammas are meant for such important activities as being easily amused, sweetly affectionate, and highly decorative.

So we have some trait concentration going along for the ride, and this creates cats whose attention to detail can a bit strong for maximum survival in the wild. It can also create cats who are misunderstood by their people.

The detail oriented cat wants their bowl set down in the same place every time. They hate it when we come home late. When their pillow is vacuumed, they want the same side facing up. Did we fold a blanket on the bed for them? How nice. Could we possibly get that wrinkle out of it?

We can be baffled that our usually easygoing cat will come up with odd details to get obsessed over. This mental trait shares some characteristics with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder in humans, in that it seems to bestow the ability to notice small details.

For both cats and humans, the tripping point is how they interpret these small clues that seem to thrust themselves into their observations. What we can do, as Cat Appreciators, is help our detail oriented cat understand what these details mean.

To us, it’s nothing. To our cat, their brain is urging them to notice these small details, because it is tripping their survival instincts. In the wild, a dislodged pebble or broken leaf can mean life or death, for someone.

Our detail oriented cat is at the mercy of this instinct in two ways:

The best thing we can do for such cats is notice (or pretend to notice) it ourselves, and then reassure them that this doesn’t mean anything bad.

Wrinkle in their bed or blanket? These small things are not small to our cat. Because of the way they see, cats can interpret a shadow as fundamentally changing an object’s shape or dimensions in a way a human cannot.

If our cat is avoiding their usual spots or objects, crying about something, or trying to draw our attention to something, the cure can be as simple as fussing with whatever it is, and then acting happy. Our leadership on this important matter might be all our cat needs.

Was it moved to a new spot? If we need to redecorate or rearrange our living quarters, such terraforming offers a challenge to any cat. For our detail oriented cat, we might as well have ripped out the entire room. All the little cues that told them they were home have vanished.

If we can, we should preserve the essence of their terrain by putting back the same blankets or beds, and creating similar spots. Give the cat reassurance by using scent cues before and after. Use fresh catnip or pungent treats to mark their stuff before, and after, the change. Scent marking will connect directly to the emotional centers in their brain, and provide them the cues they need.

Is it (the horror!) a replacement item? While our detail oriented cat is a pushover when it comes to new toys, new beds or food dishes create the opposite reaction. That’s because the tiny changes which fascinate in a new crackly or sparkly toy send off not-the-same signals when they are connected to food or safety.

If possible, juxtapose the new item with the old so some of the qualities can rub off on each other. If that’s not possible, as in the case of a broken food dish, see if we can involve our cat with the process. Sharp shards and food on the floor will trigger our own need to get it cleaned up as soon as possible, and the crash probably sent our cat scrambling out of the room.

But if we can at least show our cat the aftermath, or the clean up process, our cat will grasp that the broken dish won’t be showing up again. The new dish should be presented with especially tasty food and/or some fuss and fanfare.

Validation will communicate both that we understand it has changed, and that the change is okay.

These are the concepts our detail oriented cat struggles with, agonizes over, and needs help interpreting. These are concepts any cat has in some degree. These are concepts that many people find annoying because they don’t realize what prompts them, and, even more importantly, how they can deal with this anxiety, and shut it off.

Once we grasp the procedure, we have another fun way to communicate, and play, with our cat.

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So I’ve become something of a student of breeds in my quest for cat understanding. Guessing a given cat’s breed can be difficult when we are evaluating kittens, who tend to have similar body structures when they are tiny. With adults, we can be distracted by coat colors and overlook the little clues that tell us a lot.

When I’m trying to figure out a cat, I always check their ears and their paws.

One of the first things we might see are extra toes. This is known as a Polydactyl cat. Any cat with more than five in the front and four in the back qualifies.

The true polydactyly got that way from genetic inheritance, and is not handicapped; on the contrary, such cats literally leverage their “thumbs” into increased dexterity. Don’t hesitate to choose such a cat over health concerns; any paw with a definite thumb is not a defect that will cause the cat trouble down the road. Enjoy!

Polydactyly is such a common cat occurrence it doesn’t really clue us into a specific breed, though it is very common in the Maine Coon gene pool. Click on the picture to see the broad range of these kinds of cats, and this article has some fascinating facts.

Zoey’s picture brings up another important point, which is the color of the paw pads.

A gray cat can have pink or purple (lavender) pads. The silvery sheen on Zoey’s fur, and the color of her pads, indicate she might have some Russian Blue or French Chartreux ancestry. But such lavender pads can also point to Tonkinese, Siamese, or other “pointed” coat backgrounds.

Pink pads on a gray cat can indicate some kind of British or American shorthair genes, where the coat color is known as “blue.” Our dilute tortoiseshell, Olwyn, is also known as a “blue cream.”

As seen here, her variegated color extends to her paw pads; where the fur is dark, her pads are too, while the lighter colored toes have pink pads. This is completely normal; pigmentation usually gets picked up from coat color; but not always.

“Pointed” cats (Siamese are pointed coats) tend to bestow dark colored paw pads and nose leathers (the skin on the end of the nose) on their offspring, even if the kittens do not have the Siamese points in their coats. So dark colors on pads, especially if they do not match the fur, might point to an Oriental influence.

There’s another Oriental influence in this picture; the paw itself, which is more oval and pointed than average. A broad, large, paw is more likely to belong to the stocky “cobby type” cat.

As we can see here, in the prize winning paws of this purebred Maine Coon, big paws usually go with a big bone structure, like Persians or British Shorthairs. It’s not just that these paws are broad; they are also thick.

As RJ grew, his “Chunky chocolate bar” paws became even more apparent. This was a clue to his Maine Coon heritage.

In kittens, we can guess they will grow up to be longhaired if we notice tufts of long fur between their paws. These tufts can let us know there’s a longhaired heritage, even if the kitten is too young, or has been too compromised, to show the lush, long coat they will acquire when they mature.

It’s fun to see if our cat’s paws match their other parts. James Bond has oval ear shapes, but broad thick paws. Though he looks like a Norwegian Forest Cat, he’s not really a laid back type, as they tend to be; his focus shows more of an Oriental influence.

As always, the joy is in the mix.

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According to a recent survey, 67% of dog owners have only one dog, while 44% of cat owners have only one cat. Multiple ownership is more popular with cat owners, but that’s still a lot of Only Cats.

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But sometimes we wonder if our Only Cat is a Lonely Only. Or we feel the yen for another cat. So many people start with one cat, have a great time, and then hesitate on the threshold of the greatest challenge of all; the negotiation between Cat One and Cat Two.

But since we already passed up the easiest solution, (getting two cats at the outset,) here’s the points we will need to consider:

Officially designated. The most difficult Only Cat situation is when a shelter marks them that way. Good shelters have knowledgeable personnel and plenty of socialization opportunities. If a cat continually shows distress or aggression in that kind of situation, it makes them a poor prospect for introduction into an existing multiple cat household. Believe the tag.

However, this doesn’t mean our rehabilitated Only Cat is the same cat we brought home from the shelter. Pile up enough circumstances; poor social skills, insecurity, no exposure to other cats, and the stress of shelter living, and these cats can’t do it. Once their stress is removed, once they are happy and secure, they might be okay.

Territorially conscious. If our cat hates seeing another cat from the window, or terrorizes our mother’s lap dog, or sounds like a fire siren when they see another cat in the waiting room at the vet; we can conclude our cat is a poor prospect for living with other animals. This could be perfectly true.

But I’ve had cats who do all three of these things; and adore their cat buddies. Because their cat buddies are their friends. Trespassers, yappy dogs, and stressful situations make these cats less than social, but that’s because they have low tolerance for threatening strangers.

Acting lonely. People sometimes worry that their cat is lonely because the cat spends a lot of time gazing out the window or sprawling on the couch with a distant look. But our cat is not a moony teenaged human. When our cat is quiet and amuses themselves easily, it’s usually because our cat likes it that way.

It’s the rowdy, often-into-things, active cat who both needs, and would appreciate, a playmate. But people often don’t think of this as “acting lonely.” So they try to get the wrong cat “company.” The quiet cat isn’t missing anyone; the energetic cat needs to chase and be chased.

Consider the variables. If we start wondering when the cat is under three, has a lively activity level and a trusting, outgoing personality, what we have is a cat who would most likely love the play possibilities of their own kitten or younger cat.

If our cat has been a contented Only Cat for many years, has trouble with new people and new situations, and needs help keeping their jealousy and insecurity in check when stressed, then we probably don’t have a good prospect for getting along with a new cat companion.

But there’s a lot of variation between these two certainties, and a lot has to do with what our cat is like. A sweet, open-hearted, mature Gamma might love to have an similar cat to hang out with. An Alpha of any age might be glad of another Alpha, of any age, to enjoy exploring and experimenting with. While a Beta is the most easily social of all the cat types, and often needs companionship if left alone all day.

We can balance what we would like, and what our cat would like, by being attentive to our cat’s signals regarding their moods and their stress level. Ultimately, most Only Cats can get along with a new cat; if we match the two cats properly, and we introduce them carefully.

Above all, we should be confident and caring. That is what both our cats will need from us when we embark on broadening our cat family.

I get asked this a lot: Dear Pammy, Should I get my cat a kitten?

Evaluate our cat’s reaction to possible cat companionship with The Smell Test.

The key to happy multiple cats is proper introductions.

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Kallibunker was not like the British Shorthair kittens in the rest of the litter. He had a long slender build, large ears, and the most extraordinary soft and curly coat; like a lamb. A geneticist was consulted, and this kitten was bred back to his mother to get two more kittens, and a name: Cornish for their birthplace, and Rex for the curly-coated rex gene in mice. One of those kittens was outbred to a Siamese, adding length to the tail and size to the ears, and the cat world had a new, and very unusual, cat breed.

Pictured: Best of Breed GC, BW, RW QUAILS NEST MY PETOOTIE PIE, Black Smoke Cornish Rex Male Photo: © Chanan

Part of why that wavy coat is so short, and so soft, is that it is only the “down,” or underfur, that is grown by these cats. So they love heat sources, (including us,) and have minimal shedding.

Though this does not make them hypoallergenic, since it is the dander and saliva which creates the allergic reaction. If allergy problems are what interests people in the Cornish Rex, they should meet and greet some of these cats first.

Because they are very Alpha; high energy, high metabolism, high interest in everything, and high activity at all times. Fans laugh about their “bottomless appetites” which can be somewhat indulged since a Cornish Rex doesn’t have to be urged to exercise. They like to use their paws like hands, and are quite clever with latches and toys.

This “greyhound of the cats” is not only distinguished by their lovely coats. They have a lot of intelligence, which they bend towards being a part of whatever we do, leading to another nickname, “velcro kitties.” Their clown side is very endearing, but all Cornish Rex breeders agree that prospective appreciators must understand that moderation is not part of the Cornish Rex vocabulary.

If they want to do something, and are thwarted in some way, they will bend all their considerable will and intelligence into accomplishing their goal. People who are used to cats who spend a lot of time sleeping and thinking about where to sleep next will find a Cornish Rex to be a perpetual motion machine. Fans regard them as having only two speeds; full on and full off.

Give them plenty of running room, (both horizontal and vertical,) and lots of cuddling and craft projects, and the Cornish Rex will offer kitten levels of amusing antics well into their teen years. They are healthy and long lived cats; seeing them reach fifteen is not unusual.

The Rex gene is recessive, so mixes will look like other kinds of cats. When a purebred does turn up in rescue, it’s easy to mark them as such. While we might not get the Cornish Rex looks, it’s likely we could get the personality, wherein “Mischief” is their middle name. Such long, slender, big-eared cats can provide a reasonable facsimile, since outcrossing established the breed in the first place.

Want a Cornish Rex? Find an ethical breeder who cares about their cats, or check out the cats needing homes at Cornish Rex Friends. Check North America at Petfinder.com to see if there’s one nearby, just waiting for a home.

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There’s more about getting the cat you dream of at The Way of Cats than the article you are reading now. See MORE ABOUT CAT BREEDS.

You’re welcome.

If that made you feel better, you’re not alone.

There are many beneficial effects of stroking a cat. It lowers blood pressure. Cat owners are less likely to die of a heart attack and other cardiovascular diseases. Cat owners also have fewer strokes.

Cats can help people suffering from depression. Cats are good for children, too. It makes them less allergy prone. Perhaps most amazing of all, a cat’s purr heals broken bones.

Some of these effects are benefits from any connection with the natural world. Fish in a tank, flowers in a vase, or a stone fireplace are all positive influences in a room. Some people give dogs the extra health points, because a dog demands exercise and getting out and about. These are a good points, and may work wonderfully for those who need that nudge to get out and be active.

But I don’t know any other pet who gives so much, and asks so little. A pet who is incredibly happy just to be there with us, on our lap or on our our chair or in our room. As I often say, cats are easy. It’s easy to make them happy.

Maybe that’s why they have such a good effect on us.

For more about cats who help people, see my post Cats for People’s Problems.

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Prior to embarking upon a pet experience, we should take a few moments and consider how we plan to handle our pet responsibilities. We especially need to do that with cats, because they are the kind of pet relationship which should tap into deep wells of emotion. Otherwise, it’s a failure.

So often, the desire to get a cat does not consider the kind of pet they really are.

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I’m speaking as a person who gets attached. I’ve had many, many different kinds of pets: hamsters and guinea pigs, turtles and fish, parakeets and a parrot, cats and dogs, a lizard, a rabbit, and a monkey. Though, not all at the same time.

I always avoided snakes, since they need live food, and I’m someone who had to give up hamsters because I adored them and they didn’t live very long. The larger birds live a long time, but I don’t seem to have the same rapport with them as I do mammals. I was a child when I had my monkey; as an adult, I feel that these are wild animals who should be left there.

I want intelligence and communication. I like furry and huggable. I want to give, and get, attachment.

I think this is an important point to bring up because I’ve spoken to many people who get a cat for all the wrong reasons. They think of cats as the kind of low key, low input, pet they don’t have to do much with. A goldfish without the bowl, as it were.

Best case scenario, they get more than they bargained for, and they are happy about it. Worse case, we have a lonely, withdrawn, cat, and a person who perpetuates the myths about cats. Then, if they decide to “get serious” about pets, they get a dog, and ignore the cat even more.

It’s a tremendous waste of potential; human, and feline.

It’s no secret that I feel the average person does not “get” cats. Their heads are filled with a collection of myths, half-truths, and outright lies. Even people who love their cats and treat them well have written me, with astonishment, when a tip or trick I have put on the blog: has worked.

They discover their cats can be even more communicative, entertaining, and affectionate than they thought.

That’s how I’d like people to consider their potential cat relationship. Not only as a humane commitment that adults make to the small and helpless in their care. But the hope of something they might not have expected.

A deep and lasting friendship.

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While it is always good to consult our intuition, this cannot be the final decision maker when there might be other considerations which must influence our choice.

But it is an excellent start.

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As a precaution, there is the tale known as “the little gray ear.” I found kitten Ordell under a pile of other kittens. All that showed was one little gray ear; which I could not resist.

I had come to get an Ordell, and I got an Ordell, just as Dear Husband, laid up and unable to come, had asked. I should not have agreed to an Ordell, though; not in a small apartment with someone ill. He was capital-A Alpha; as much as we loved him, we could not make him happy.

A friend agreed to foster him, there was mutual falling-in-love, and it had a very happy ending.

Ordell is all grown up now, with a kitten of his own.

It’s not that my intuition steered me wrong. We both adored Ordell, who loved us back. We easily made connections. I knew he was an Alpha, but I didn’t know how much of one he would be.

Puffy had gotten along with many Alpha cats in the past, but when Puffy was only one of three, there was cat friction between them. Mr. Bond played with Ordell at such a big volume he was getting in trouble. Mr. Bond never gets in trouble!

So Ordell was a good fit for me. But he wasn’t for the rest of the house. When I found a bigger house, more compatible cats, and a person who also took a shine to him, Ordell was even happier.

So while a connection must be there, it alone is not enough. We can do many things for our cats, by either giving them a home or finding them a home.

We just need to be clear about the kinds of fit both are offering.

For more on choosing with our emotions, see my posts Feeling the Connection, and The Cat of Destiny.

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If we had a hard time dealing with a pet’s death when we were young, we can have even more trepidation over it. But it’s important to do it right. Here’s some help:

Consider the child’s age. A toddler needs less information than a grade schooler, while a teenager can discuss philosophy and religion along with their grief.

This might be the child’s first encounter with mortality. Be sincere about what we know, or don’t know, about where the cat is now.

Do not be defensive. Often, our child will be upset that we cannot fix this. Explain that this makes us sad, too.

If we made the decision to put our cat to sleep, we can feel nervous about telling this to our child. If they ask, they are aware of the concept, and thus, need it explained to them. Otherwise, we can explain that the cat was very sick or very old, and this is what happens.

Let the child lead. If the child wants to rush out and get another cat, be sensible about acquiring the right one, but do not impose an arbitrary deadline.

Why create anxiety about whether or not they can bond with another cat? This can be why a child is eager to try the experience again. They can still miss their cat.

On the other hand, some children jump to the conclusion that they will never love a cat they have been very close to. Discuss this with them as they ask curious questions, and we can reassure them about the regenerative nature of love.

It can be a teaching moment. If there was some culpability in the cat’s death, such as letting them out and they got run over, we must be able to handle our child’s sense of guilt. Help them understand they didn’t really think their cat would get hurt, or they would not have done it.

This can also be a time to explain why we take good care of the cat, and why we have to take them to the vet sometimes, even though they do not like it.

Model the right response. We can show our child what mourning is like, how to handle it, and when to expect it to be over.

While we should indulge our tender feelings, it is not healthy to prevent healing and closure by refusing to allow ourselves to feel better at times.

This is a good thing for everyone to learn.

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He’s puzzled about why he wants to nap more often. He watches the kittens, and seems to vaguely remember when he was that lively. He asks for attention a little more often, since he’s missing some play time.

Though never treat time.

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Cats go through a lot of the same confusion and recalibration people do as they grow older. I’m sure Mr. Bond doesn’t understand how he feels at times. My job is to cheer him up and let him shrug off the changes. Because he is not as busy physically, he needs other kinds of stimulation.

We can give more hugs, though do it gently, as they might be feeling a littler stiffer than before. I do more Petting in Place with Mr. Bond, especially when he is in transit. When he is lying on the bed, he is more relaxed, and fair game.

We can say more sweet things, if softly, because they have more tender feelings now. As cats age, they have more trust in being taken care of; they no longer put in the energy to put up a front as often as they used to. It is less enjoyable, and less needed.

So we can indulge ourselves with our senior cat, perhaps more than we ever have before. We can find our cat enjoys being joked with, and they will be more interested playing small mental games with us.

While Mr. Bond still enjoys play, and it is good for him, too, he stops sooner lately. But he hangs around to watch the kittens. It can leave an entertainment deficit, so we bring toys to him more often. I find he will create pretexts to discuss things with us, even if the situation has not changed.

Older cats do not have a true understanding of what is happening when they grow older. In the wild, they would not have done so very often.

When we care for a senior cat, we are both in uncharted territory.

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